Back, maybe?

So, it’s been almost five months since I last posted, yeah? My summer was largely bereft of crafting. Hubs and I packed up mid-May for the home we were looking to buy…we thought to be in by late June. Soooo we lived surrounded by boxes while I enjoyed my time off between graduation and residency starting…then residency started- still no house. I went through my entire first rotation, cardiology, driving from the east side of Milwaukee to my residency, about 30 minutes away (depending on traffic.) Ick. The day I started Teaching Service (residency-speak for working 14-hour days six days per week) we FINALLY closed on the house. Woot! But we had no furniture because the movers weren’t coming till the next week. No matter- we slept on the floor.

That whole month (August) proved to be really hard- I had some really difficult patients and really hard call days. No one tells you that when you finish med school and are officially a doctor that all that responsibility is crushing and terrifying. Enter my panic attacks the last week of TS. I ran out of gas, mentally and physically. It was pretty wretched. I was supposed to be on an OB rotation afterwards- but with my anxiety out of control, I was put on an easier month instead (I am SO not ready to run an OB floor overnight by myself!!) In addition, I’ve been feeling isolated because most of my dearest friends from the past four years are spread over the four corners of the United States for residency, and those who remain are just as busy as I am. My new fellow-interns are great, but it takes time to bond with people, and I’m feeling rather lonely and bereft for now.

I’m getting lots of help from my faculty, fellow residents, family and some friends, (and, of course, The Hubs) but it’s been really tough this past 6 weeks. I’m slowly getting better, but anxiety is like a dirty little bastard- sneaks up on you when you least expect it. And living in a new house (even one that I’ve been hoping and dreaming of!) is a huge transition, so there’s an issue of feeling “at home” and having a “safe place” to be. With all the shit I’ve been dealing with inside my own crazypants brain, I’ve precious little energy for creating. I’ve got a few preggers friends who need presents, so that should help kick-start something, but honestly, I’m just exhausted. I’ve STILL got a dress I finished in May that I haven’t photographed.

On the plus side, I have my very own crafty room at this house! The house is a 3-bedroom ranch with a walk-out basement, and there are two finished rooms in the basement, so I get one of the upstairs rooms for crafting, and Hubs is using the left-hand downstairs room for his office (he works from home). We’ve painted it Behr’s Ionic Blue, and it’s the purdiest room EVAR. I’m still in the process of putting it together, but I’m hoping that next week my fellow lady-interns will come over for a crafting fiesta.

There’s a lot of work to be done on the house, and I’m hoping to chronicle some of it here. Just wait till you guys see the kitchen floor….Yikes.

Anywho, hopefully this long and silly post will herald my return to blogging, crafting, and feeling like a normal human being.

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5 thoughts on “Back, maybe?

  1. I’m sorry about the anxiety. New doctors get a rough deal in training 😦

    But new house! Yay! I have no idea what a ranch is (sounds big. Sounds like there should be horses and cows and cowboys!) or a walk out basement, but I’m confident they’re awesome. I hope you feel settled and at home real soon.

    And meh re frequency / regularity of posting. Technology has that sorted.

    Sending good vibes in your direction.

  2. I’m glad you are feeling better! I haven’t had much time to craft either. There are Joann’s everywhere here and a Michael’s mere blocks from my house, too!

    Your craft room sounds really pretty! I’m super jealous. We don’t have room for anything in our new place.

  3. So I want to see a new pic of the craft room. I imagine that the Dr. residency is tough … but my Dad was in the hospital and all the nurses and Doctors really put our mind at ease — you are doing a good thing … and he probably was a difficult patient!

  4. Three huge cheers for having your own craft room! I had a super tiny one at our old apartment, but it wasn’t until we moved into our current condo (in 2012) that I got a real, decent sized craft room in the basement. It’s such a joy to not have ten thing stacked atop each other while crafting. Unfortunately I haven’t been able to get in much of that this year due to my health (some years are just like that, I’ve long found), but hopefully I’ll be able to whip up a few new project before 2013 throws in the towel.

    Big hugs & joyful Tuesday wishes,
    ♥ Jessica

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